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Is that still allowed? Or are you going to make a note that I’m some kind of freak?”She smiled gently. “No, you’re not a freak. But if you’re not very sexual, why the dreams?”I looked into my lap, where my fists were clenched.Siobhan went on. “Our time's almost up. I think part of you wants more from your sex life, maybe not exactly as in your dream, but not what you have now. You could dip a toe in, and build from there. I can help you process your feelings along the way. Or you could just jump in at the deep end. Would you ever consider a threesome?”“No!”“Why not? Plenty of people do.”“I’m not a slut!”“I hate that label! Before your next visit, I want you to think about where you got that label from. Whose voice is in your subconscious judging you?”I smiled and thanked her politely, thinking there was no chance of a next visit. And trying hard not to hear my mother’s voice telling me what good girls should not ever do.*That night, the dreams were more intense. This time, while I. "He shrunk down in his seat immediately as I said his name. People werelooking around to identify who I was looking at, but for the most part heremained inconspicuous to those who weren't immediately around him. Ididn't wait though, and launched straight into the song with only Jason'sguitar accompanying me.As I sang through the words that made up the majority of the chorus, Iwatched as Paul raised his head to listen. Then the rest of the bandjoined in with a crash of the drums for a moment before we settled intothe first verse. I talked about how amazed I was to find myself in thepublic spotlight. I sung about how none of what had happened wassomething I had been searching for in my life. Then we launched into thechorus that talked about how scared I was at what was happening to me,but it also talked about how I was doing my best to overcome those fearsand press on.This was a very upbeat, fun song to sing, and Kate's choreography playedon that. Once again many of the fans were on.
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